Sup, and welcome to the first installment of Mr. Mondays. When my wife first asked me to do this, I had no idea why. I have no knowledge what so ever about crafting, scrapbooking, sewing other than the first two are messy and the last one is loud. But, she reassured me that she was just looking for a male prospective to place in her blog. That really all I have to do is just rant and rave, or bitch, about how much things in life are great (Sex, videogames, the band Rush) and how much they suck(work, responsibility, pretty much anything that requires me to wake up before 10:00 am). I first think that this will be easy, because hell there is a gazillion(rough estimate) blogs out there of people just like me, and just like you, who write about their views on life, their opinions, their life ambitions and blah, blah, blah. See it is easy to write a blog, because hell everyone does, the hard part is making it interesting enough for others to read. That’s the problem, how can I, a mild mannered capitalist slave make my own neanderthal ideas appealing to those with more well lived and better educated minds than my own. What past life experience can I display over the world wide intraweb that will not shame and embarrass me or someone close to me or result in criminal charges(what happens in the back alley behind Denny’s, stays in the back alley behind Denny’s).
Well I guess the first thing I could do is talk about myself. I am a southern poorly mis/under-educated 20+ year old who sees the whole world through the big bubble formed by the talkin’ movin’ picture box. I grew up around music, be the classic and southern rock from my dad, R&B and country from my Mom, and heavy metal from my cousins. My whole family was a musical family, my dad played guitar and was viewed like a shaman. Basically if you wanted your right of passage, it was not to graduate high school, go to college to get some degree and the get some career with said degree, no it was to learn how to play “Swamp Music” by Lynyrd Skynyrd before you are 12 on the guitar, and my father was the one you learned it from. For me it was the summer between 8th grade, going to 9th grade. I had a cousin who was about 2 years older than me, and he had asked my dad to teach him how to play. I got kindly jealous that my father (who by his own drunken proclamations claims that “Eric Clapton aint got shit” on him) was teaching my cousin so I decided to take lessons too. The first song we learned was “House of the Rising Sun”, after I learned that I took to the guitar like a crack head to crack ( I know there’s better metaphors but that’s the one I went with and I stand by it). Come to present day and I am a self proclaimed guitar hero (Clapton apparently ain’t got shit on me either) and proud owner of 9 guitars, and the collection could grow any day.
Aside from crack like guitar addictions, I also am a comic book geek. Yes Batman is cooler than Superman, no I am not crazy and yes I can kick your ass. Comic books practically taught me how to read, and WRITE!!! apparently. I am not however the guy who collects comic books, leaves them in cellophane prisons and banishes them on a shelf and try to kill anyone that tries to read them. I see them as art and literature, and good art and literature should be seen and read.
Lastly, I am the luckiest guitar addicted comic book geek in the world; for I am married to the greatest woman on earth, and the greatest crafting, scrapbooking and loud ass sewer on the face of the planet. I am very proud of what my wife has done and proud of what my wife creates daily! At first when she told me, (while I was deeply asleep) that she was going to devote her time to creating dresses and jewelry, I was slightly interested. But now after all the money she has made, I am a rich stay at home husband in our house in Miami and I have a small army of shitzu’s at my command. But seriously, I see that this makes my wife happy, for those of you who don’t know her, she works hard on every order, maintains the website, the blog and still has time to be the best wife since Marge Simpson.
So I don’t know if I’ve actually said anything of any value, or even gave a hint of what the blog Mr. Monday will be, because I really I don’t know what I am supposed to be talking about. But I promise my next blog post will have a topic, with a coherent beginning, middle and end. AND will be somewhat entertaining instead of a colossal waste of time.